In a recent post, Joshua told of our move from Upstate California to San Francisco. As newcomers to this metropolis, we needed jobs, and perhaps more importantly, we needed to fit in. Joshua decided to follow his muse, and join the poetry scene in North Beach (he will share his experiences in a future post). As for me, I decided to stay in the food business. I moved across the Bay to Berkeley to become a restaurateur, as I know how to spell that word and, moreover, I have a French accent.

Check out the menu I designed for my future restaurant!

CHEZ HENRI

We use no-cigar produce whenever possible. Glutton-free and native-gear items available upon request.

Fast Break LOX TALK AND BERYL bagel special L’EMOTE eggs, theater style BUILD-YOUR-OWN SCRAMBLE you choose the letters, we do the rest

Munch I-GREC club sandwich AUNT EM tuna melt with a dash

Word Salads KALAMATA JANE olives OLD MAN’S almonds GENRES mixed greens YOU CAN’T BEET this SOUPE DU JOUR soup of the day SOUPE DE JAVU soup of the day before

Pizza PLANE PEPPERONI kind of spray on individual’s face RENT MONEY flatbread

Pasta B

Entrees OXYMORON jumbo shrimp KITCHEN BASTER chicken breast KEATS meat or fish, depending BLEW PLAIT special

Taking Sides FRANÇAIS FIRES POOR LAWS cabbage

Beverages EPISCOPAL soft drink OH, LOCAL! hard drink MACHO strong coffee HENRI Rhine wine

Desserts TSARINA cheese plate

In addition to this remarkable menu, I’d offer GUACK-A-MOLE, an avocado video game to keep the children entertained while the adults solve a puzzle or two while waiting for their food. At Chez Henri the “writing in the air” gesture, which in other restaurants means “the bill, please,” would mean “may I have a pencil?” To ask for the bill, customers would operate an air calculator, which makes a lot more sense, no?

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