¿Qué es lo más cabrón que te ha pasado en la vida? The most fucked-up thing to happen to me? Addled by busyness, I crumpled my life and let it drop and then I outlived my life, rocking on my misery like a cypress in the wind. I watched stars emerge from a black egg. Lucidity of loss. Someone came to tell me the spider vibrating on its long legs in the ceiling corner over my desk does not exist now. It is wedged between the violent uninterruptedness of one single day and the void I discovered inside myself. Forehead tautening with self-pity. I said, You think you know me, but you don’t know me from Adam’s goat. And she said, I do, and you are one and the same thing.