Inspections: The White House Fallback Position Inspections: The White House Fallback Position
If nothing shows in spyplane pics And Blix finds nothing in the sticks, That still won't put us in a fix. We'll blame it on Iraqi tricks,
Nov 26, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Shmeer the Kids In Shmeer the Kids In
(An Upper East Side Sea Chanty Sung to the tune of 'Blow the Man Down')
Nov 20, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The Silver Lining of General Rove’s Victory In the Midterm Elections The Silver Lining of General Rove’s Victory In the Midterm Elections
The talk of war has done its job. Rove's hopes were far exceeded. So maybe, with the voting done, The war itself's not needed.
Nov 14, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
The Ballad of Harvey Pitt The Ballad of Harvey Pitt
(With apologies, once again, to Stephen Sondheim and his demon barber)
Nov 7, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
More Danger in Sniper Case More Danger in Sniper Case
With sniper suspect now in jail, DAs are fighting tooth and nail. They're in a monumental race To see who gets to try this case
Oct 31, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Saddam Hussein’s Election Victory Saddam Hussein’s Election Victory
Unanimous is what the vote count was. He didn't miss a voter, to our knowledge. The triumph his, he now remains in charge, Unless he lost in the Electoral College.
Oct 24, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Short Summary of the Nobel Peace Prize Announcement A Short Summary of the Nobel Peace Prize Announcement
(Translated From the Norwegian) The Nobel Carter finally got He got 'cause he's what Bush is not.
Oct 17, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
A Chickenhawk Cheer A Chickenhawk Cheer
Bomb 'em now, kill 'em now, zim, boom, bah Chickenhawks, chickenhawks, rah, rah, rah. Vietnam reverberates. (We were rooting from the States.)
Oct 10, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
Exit Robert (The Torch) Torricelli Exit Robert (The Torch) Torricelli
The Torch could not make folks forget The graft for which he's cited. The only slogan left to use Was "Never been indicted."
Oct 3, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin
There’s No, No In Your Eyes There’s No, No In Your Eyes
As Sung to Saddam Hussein by George W. Bush (With apologies to Eddy Howard, and anybody who becomes collateral damage)
Sep 26, 2002 / Column / Calvin Trillin